The Powerful INFJ’s

We see the world in a different way. That doesn’t make us weak, it actually makes us powerful. We’re more capable of creating change. As Steve Jobs said, “Think Different.” We don’t have to even try to think different, we do by nature. I see myself as an innovator. A creative and free spirited person.

Some days I feel like I can conquer the world, and other days I feel discouraged by people’s need to put me in a box and treat me as if I’m just like everyone else. I’m sure to most people I’m just an average person because I don’t show all my colors to the world. I don’t stand out in a crowded room. I’m humble, and I don’t like to talk too highly of myself. I also keep all my deep emotions mostly to myself. And still once in awhile it’s just painful to be so different.

Being an INFJ is one of the few things that is extremely unique about me. INFJ’s are less than 2% of the population. If there’s so few of us, isn’t that a sign that were suppose to be more and do more? Instead of being treated as if there’s something wrong with us, shouldn’t people all around us be encouraging us to follow our dreams and create change?

We can be powerful, if we believe in ourselves, if we turn off all the voices judging us, if we keep reminding ourselves that being different is a gift. We are capable of so much more than the world is going to give us credit for. We can make our own choices though. We build the world in our heads. We have to stop our fears by reminding ourselves that we can be more successful than others due our INFJ qualities. Because we see things differently. We are more determined.

All we have to do is find our passions and dive down deep into them. Let our passions take over us and guide us on our life journey. There’s so few of us, which is why it’s important that we help each other to not get pushed down and trampled on by others and the weight of the world. The world is a better place with more INFJ’s following their dreams, because they, we, in fact can create change in the world.

Feeling Like an Alien in the World

I’ve always felt like an alien in the world ever since I could remember. I’m told that’s normal for INFJ’s. Still, I reach out for some aspects of normal in my life and instead I find myself dwindling further and further away from normal. The more I dive into my complex personality the more I realize how uniquely different I am from everyone else. The more I learn about the culture of the country I live in the more I understand why I’ve felt like an alien and even inferior to others.

The biggest problem I face is my inability to conform to a society where extroversion is valued more than introversion. I can ignore this in every aspect of my life except the career world. It’s a society with so many rules on how a professional should think and react in every given situation. The people with the best oral skills gets the job – the people with the power of persuasion. I’m a better writer then a speaker. But, I hate being told what to do and working for companies closed off to new ideas (which so many of them are). I’m not some radical that won’t listen and conform to company culture, I will, but I’ll hate it. I don’t want to impress people and pretend I’m something I’m not. They say “just be who are in interviews,” yet there’s all kinds of rules about what to say, what not to say, how to act and it’s encouraged to tell white lies. I’m one of the most honest people in this world I can’t stand even telling one little white lie. Everyone tells me that the right job is out there for me, and I honestly don’t agree. Where people tell me to not give up, not understanding that it’s not in my nature to. But, what happens when I get another job? It lasts a year, if I’m lucky, 5 years and then I’m back out there again looking. So, I just keeping working on my skills and building up my skills for being a entrepreneur meanwhile playing the stupid job game.

I know I see the world differently and I want to share my inner perspective with the world in an epic way, but I can’t until I’m successful. People listen to the successful people, people don’t question the successful people.

I learned not only do I have the personality type of an INFJ, but I also have the inventive personality type. I looked at the overlap of jobs for inventive types, INFJ types and HSP’s and found little to no overlap in the type of jobs that would interest me. Any creative adventure on my own just sounds more fun. I embrace my uniqueness, but at the same time find myself jealous of others who have it so easy, who don’t have to work so hard to fit into the world. Having such a complex personality really complicates my career journey and is extra complicated in a difficult economy. I wish sometimes that I wasn’t born to this generation, but I know in time I will find my way. I’m absorbing information like a sponge so that I don’t get left behind in this world. With society no longer having job security gaining new skills and knowledge are the only things I can keep.

I have so many friends living out the normal life with full time jobs, houses and plans for kids (some already pregnant) and I just nod along like I have plans for all that normal stuff too. I only have a couple friends not setting their life up for all the normal stuff. My one and only friend who does think the same way as me lives out of state. Some days I wish I could just feel normal and plan my life out the same way. But, I know normal will always be twice as hard for me being an hsp. So I can’t try to be what society wants me to be, or what I’ve been brought up to believe I should be. There just has to be a another place for me.

The Journey to Change The World

If you were to change one thing about the world or the country you live in what would it be? What one thing would you like to be able to say you made a significant impact on? 

I read this article a couple weeks ago written by John Hughes about being an HSP and he said something that really resonated with me and it’s been on my mind ever since. He said: “We carry a responsibility to do something with all that we create inside our minds and hearts as if it’s not ours, but something we owe back to the world.” – John Hughes I had to ponder over this for awhile because I couldn’t believe how true those words were. I’m not sure how many people feel this way – but I have unknowingly felt this way for a good chunk of my life.

This blog is an example of that. I felt this need to write about what’s in my mind and in my heart for a long time and to share it – years before I even started this blog. However, this blog is only a tiny piece of what’s inside my mind and heart. There’s so many things being created in my mind and my heart that it’s overwhelming. I feel like there’s something huge I’m suppose to be doing and I’m working toward figure it out. The problem is it takes time (I’m not patient) I have a ton of interests and dreams from writing a book, to creating videos, to product designs, to painting, to graphic design, photography, to creating advertisements, blogging, and creating my own service business. And there’s no possible way I can do all of these things at once – maybe I’m meant to do almost all of them or only a few. For some reason I want to do all of them. I’m trying to focus on just one but I want to create so many things!

Since high school I have had this strong ambition to do something that would truly make a difference in other people’s lives. I threw away that idea after college due to a bad economy, need for money, and a low self-esteem. Still, it followed me nonetheless. It followed me along with my childhood dreams to be an inventor and a writer but an artist above all. It followed me the same way my dreams of being an entrepreneur never went away. No matter what job I’ve had these dreams have always been there. No matter how good at my job I am my jobs never seem to last. So I’ve opened up my mind to all possibilities. I’m trying meditation, I’m reading and researching. I’ve been logging all of my thoughts and ideas in journals.

I have this responsibility to create something and write, this need to make an impact in other people’s lives and I can’t ignore it. Many days I’ve cried about it in the past and got a regular 9 to 5 job and tried a part time job only to find out it wouldn’t last. But, it’s not just being an HSP it’s also my INFJ personality type. I’ve read:

“INFJ’s want to save the world without being noticed” (this is entirely true – that’s why you don’t know who I am, and I don’t want any fame associated with my face ever – at times I’ve wished I was invisible)
“INFJ’s believe they can come up with humanitarian issues (helping to improve the welfare and happiness of people).

So, if I’m meant in someway to save the world and share all that I create in my mind and my heart I thought this might be a good place to start. Here is my list of changes I want to see in the world:

1. More acceptance of people who are different: introverts, highly sensitive people and others.
2. More people accepting their highly sensitive and introvert traits and living out their dreams
3. More people living out their dreams by thinking for themselves and living their life not the life someone else planned for them. Not a life where they are constantly beating themselves because society taught them to feel bad about who they are.
4. A stronger economy with more people thinking for themselves (researching) rather then believing everything they hear on the radio or television, or from other people’s mouths.
5. Less lies! Lies about the food we eat, lies in the news, lies from companies ect…
6. More companies not afraid of creativity and innovation
7. Less chemicals in food with healthier restaurants
8. More job security and easier interview processes
9. Doctors who care more
10. Less judgement in the world in general

Today is almost over and I’m actually a bit frustrated about that – because I would like to get started now! I want to change the world today! I’ve been putting it off for far too long. That kind of sounds like I have a big ego or something, but I really don’t. I just fear the path of never finding out what I’m truly capable of. I fear never finding my true calling in life and feeling an emptiness because of it. Some people never do, but I refuse to be one of them.

Being Someone or Something Your Not

I have on a subconscious and sometimes a conscious level tried and pushed too hard to fit in with people very different from me. I have tried and pushed too hard to fit into group cultures that didn’t suit me. I want to make a pact with myself from this day forward to stop the whirlwind of trying to fit in with anyone or anything that doesn’t align with the person I am.

I grew up with a family that is everything that I’m not. I haven’t learned much from them because I rarely listened to them. They were overwhelming. I didn’t know who I was until I left. I have already made a pact with myself after I left that I would never again get caught in a situation with them where the exit door wasn’t in sight. Secondly, I will never spend more time with them then I want to. Thirdly, I will dodge their calls if I feel they are calling too much. Fourthly, I will never again let them give me advice on my life that I didn’t ask for. Lastly, I won’t let them talk about my childhood like they were good parents and they somehow had a positive influence on the person I am today.

I also grew up in a culture of Greeks. My Mom is Greek and if you know anything about the Greeks they are loud and usually outgoing extroverts. It sounds like a stereotype but I went to a church full of them. Then, there was me the girl who seemed shy and fearful of the world. I was so incredibly out of place. I made friends with some people during my high school years and enjoyed the friendships, but they slowly faded away. I always made the effort to socialize at my church and found so many people would talk to me for a few minutes before moving on to the next person – this was incredibly annoying! I have had many awkward situations like this. I have tried to socialize with people and been shut out of a conversation. I come home and just feel a huge energy drain, I never realized why until about a month ago. I’ve been working too hard to be something I’m not for all these years. No matter how badly I wanted to fit in I don’t, and I never will. I felt the desire to because my church is filled with family and many fun people. I love certain things about the church I grew up in but I don’t enjoy going. I don’t belong. I never did. I’m not your typical Greek and I’m never going to be. But, I will always love the food and beautiful holiday services. I have made a pact with myself to church hop until I find a church that I like.

I also want to make a pact with myself to no longer feel bad about the things that I’m not good at by nature. I’m not good at solving problems or answering complex questions on the spot, or doing tedious activities for several hours, speaking in front of large groups of people or having social conversations with strangers. I get overwhelmed easily, I’m highly sensitive, and that’s just who I am. Yes, I can and have gotten better at many of these things, but I’m not going to feel bad that I’m not great at them. I’m not going to let anyone make me feel bad for something I’m not good at when I have strengths in so many other things. I’m not going to put myself in situations where I will be forced to use more of my weaknesses then my strengths. I’m going to embrace the fact that there is a lot of stuff I’m good at and I’m going to indulge in the fact that I am smart and growing smarter everyday.

I’m growing smarter each day the more I read and learn and discover who I am day in and day out. Some people don’t spend much time in their lives discovering and exploring who they are. Some people coast through life without any real thoughts on what kind of life would truly make them happy. I think I’m a stronger person because I have. The more time I spend creating the best version of myself the more I can contribute to this world and the happier I will become.

If people have a problem with who I am, where I am going, and what path I choose to follow that’s their problem not mine! I’m going to strip myself of anything that doesn’t feel right to me. I’m done being someone or something I’m not! I’m working everyday on discovering how someone as incredibly unique as me can do something incredibly unique with their time. I need to find a path that won’t make me question who I am or try to change me into something I’m not. That ship has already sailed and sunk.

Everyday I feel I’m different from everyone else. I’m not ordinary. If there’s so few people like me that must mean I’m meant to do something extraordinary (beyond what is usual, ordinary, regular, or established).

Words to Inspire: 25 Inspirational Quotes

Words can inspire and words can change your way of thinking about your life and the world around you. I’ve created a list of 25 inspirational quotes about happiness, dreams, life and embracing who you are.

These are all quotes I believe in and some that have even inspired me to change my way of thinking about things. For most of my life I’ve struggled with self-esteem issues and reading inspiring articles and quotes was one of the things that helped me change my way of thinking. The 3rd quote about loving and accepting yourself and how it makes everything in life work is something that took me years and years to figure out. It’s something I’m continuously working on, but only recently realized how truly powerful it can be.

The 2nd quote: “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself,” I found several years ago and it made me think about the type of person I wanted to be. It is a reminder that I have the power to create the ideal version of myself. It’s sort of a quote I’ve lived by along with my first quote about happiness. I created my blog title “Creating Your Life Journey” with this quote in the back of my mind.

1. Being happy doesn’t mean everything is perfect. It means you have decided to look beyond the imperfections. – Unknown
2. LIFE ISN’T ABOUT FINDING YOURSELF. LIFE IS ABOUT CREATING YOURSELF. – Unknown
3. I find that when we really love and accept and approve of ourselves exactly as we are, then everything in life works. – Louise Hay
4. How you feel has nothing to do with what is happening in your life. It’s merely your interpretation of what’s going on. – Unknown
5. Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear. – George Addair
6. Confidence is the key. If you don’t believe in yourself, then nobody will. – Unknown
7. It is what difference we have made to the lives of others that will determine the significance of the life we lead. – Nelson Mandela
8. Limitations live only in our minds. But if we use our imaginations, our possibilities become limitless. – Jamie Paolinetti
9. If you don’t build your dream, someone will hire you to help build theirs. – Tony Gaskins
10. What you expect to happen, happens. Life responds to your outlook. – Unknown
11. Most folks are about as happy as they make their minds up to be. – Abraham Lincoln
12. Your time is limited so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. – Steve Jobs
13. My dad has always been really helpful. He taught me that talent is a bonus, but persistence is what wins out. – Zosia Mamet
14. Everybody has a creative potential & from the moment you can express this creative potential, you can start changing the world.  – Paulo Coelho
15. Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for. – Epicurus
16. The only thing standing between you and your goal is the BS story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.
    – Unknown
17. Happiness is not something you postpone for the future; it is something you design for the present. – Jim Rohn 
18. Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. – Charles Swindoll
19. The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
20. It’s your place in the world; it’s your life. Go on and do all you can with it, and make it the life you want to live. – Mae Jemison
21. Change your thoughts and you change your world. – Norman Vincent Peale
22. Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing. – Benjamin Franklin
23. The only way to do great work is to love what you do. – Steve Jobs
24. Surround yourself with people who only bring you positive energy and you shall have a positive life. –Unknown
25. At some point you just have to let go and move on because no matter how painful it is, it’s the only way we grow. – Unknown

What inspires you? Have you run across a quote that completely changed your way of thinking about some aspect of life? Please share.

Accepting Who You Are

I’ve been struggling with accepting who I am all my life. As a shy sensitive introvert I’ve always felt out of place in this world. I’ve never felt like I fit in. I had little to no self-esteem when I was growing up, made worse by the fact that people didn’t understand me. I’m a very private person and my parents never gave me the space I needed. I often felt trapped. If you read my “Solving Your Life Puzzle” post I touch more on this and my difficult childhood.

I always felt like I had such a complex personality and was often confused by my own emotions. When I would get angry at someone I would struggle on whether to share my feelings or ignore them. I was conflicted on how to handle different aspects of my life. I’ve also had a hard time making decisions. I’m completely driven by my emotions and worry how my decisions will reflect my future emotions.

When I took psychology in high school I learned that I operate equally with both my left brain and my right brain. Learning this helped me to realize why I was so confused by my own personality. I also took the Briggs and Myers personality test and learned that I’m an INFJ. I remember when I walked up to the teacher to hand in my test he said my personality type was very rare. I knew I was different, but I didn’t know what to do with it at the time. When I’m faced with the challenge of being me I often think about that moment. Just yesterday I ran across a blog of someone who is also an INFJ. I had never seen such a long description describing this personality type and I couldn’t believe how much it described me. I just had to write this post after seeing it. If you’re interested you can read more about INFJ’s on her blog: http://truthloveunity.wordpress.com/2014/01/21/my-personality-type-infj/

Reading how I’m an INFJ and my personality type is the rarest kind of makes me feel special. After years of struggling with my self-confidence; these last few months I’ve finally started embracing who I am. I’ve always felt the pressure to change who I am to fit in and find a place in this world. I’m my biggest critic of myself and I’m often really hard on myself. I’m struggling right now because I know I should be doing other things right now, but all I want to do is write. I’ve ignored my drive to write for a long time and when I’m compelled to write it’s often when I’m busy doing something else. Like in high school I wrote poetry when I was suppose to be paying attention in class. But, I’ve learned that writing is a part of me. The problem is once I start I won’t stop or rest until all my words flow out of me. I can’t stand any interruptions because I know I might lose my train of thought.

What I’ve started to realize is there’s nothing more important than accepting who you are and being happy with it. I went to this networking event where a speaker said “You have control of only two things in your life and two things only! Your thoughts and your actions.” I’ve become a happier person through learning more about myself and accepting the bad with the good. The thing is we create the world we live in. The world is the way it is because we perceive it that way and because we take action in deciding how we want to live our lives.

I get so bored lately with my life and I want to change things, but the income isn’t there to do what I want. I’m trying to find a way to make money in this tough economy and I’m the most determined person I know, but yet I still struggle. Lately I find myself daydreaming about living a different life. Which upsets me but also makes me wonder what will really bring my spirit to life? What kind of career would make me excited to get out of bed every morning?

After writing this I’ve just come up with three more ideas on blog posts. I just can’t seem to stop my train of thought. I plan to write one on how to discover/create who you are and accept it as a follow up to this one.

That’s all for now. Hope to hear from you.