I Hate Faking How I Feel and Lying

I hate pretending that I’m fine when I’m not, even if it’s strangers, even if it’s customer service, even if it’s for the best. It’s worse when I have to smile and say that I’m “great” when really I’m the exact opposite. I hate lying. I can’t even stand to tell a white lie. If I ever lie it’s as close to the truth as possible. When my husband lies it’s the exact opposite and I feel all awkward to be part of his lie, even though there always so small and insignificant. Like when he’s lied about why we were late arriving at a family member’s house. Usually me being open and honest works out pretty good for me. But, I do have to fake how I feel in a lot of situations and it’s extremely difficult sometimes. I can mold myself to fit into many situations based on who I’m with and what I’m doing, but I can’t handle it when I’m in emotional pain. When I’m in emotional pain it takes me a few seconds more to get out those words “I’m g..great..!”


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