I don’t think anyone can destroy or change my view on the world or my view on me. Quite possibly the two people who know me the best have the power to do so, but I trust and strongly believe they never will.
I’ve done a lot of reading about life, success, and happiness. I understand that my perceptions of the world are only my perceptions, not reality. I understand that I make mistakes in life, but my mistakes don’t define me. I understand that I was made perfectly, just the way I am.
When I spend time with my family it’s mostly for holidays and social gatherings. I enjoy their company as long as I know I can leave at any time. It truly bothers me that they only see the world through their own eyes and don’t quite understand that there is multiple ways of seeing it. I know the way I see the world is flawed at times, and I let myself be overcome by jealousy and judgement toward others. But, I know that the way I see things is shaped by my personality and my experiences. So, I try often to take a step back and judge whether I’m viewing a situation or person unfairly because I’m only thinking and feeling a certain way as a result of my own perceptions. I try to see the world from other people’s points of view.
I keep thinking someday, someday I will make them see the world differently. Someday, they will know who I am. They don’t know me, and the sad part is that they think they do. But, in order for them to know who I am, and how uniquely different I am from everyone else, they need to learn how to change their perceptions. How do you make someone understand that the way they see things is not reality? I really want to know!
How do you make someone understand what it means to by highly sensitive, when they never listened to your needs or bothered to care that you were different? Someday, I want them to know and understand. Someday I want them to stop judging me based on their own personality and experience. Someday, I want them to understand that they never showed me the respect I deserved. How do you talk to someone who doesn’t understand what it means to feel everything so deeply? How do you talk to someone who listens to you one minute, and within a day does the complete opposite of what they promised? Someone who looks at you as flawed, because they can’t understand why your needs are different from theirs. But, my flaws are not my personality, they are my gifts.
Being different is okay.