Change overwhelms me and heightens my emotional state of being. These days there are lots of big changes happening, but not the changes I need to follow my dreams and my goals. People are having babies, my one and only sibling is moving to another state, and I have nothing happening. I’m happy for them. I do not envy them, I am not jealous, I just feel stuck. Only jealous of their excitement to embrace something new. I’m stressed all the time and tired all the time. I’m just looking forward to the day when I feel I’m able to achieve my dreams and goals with less stress and the money to experiment.
Being highly sensitive I find myself observing all my husbands emotions and stresses of finding a new job. I take on my own emotions and aggravations with life, and I take on his emotions. I understand how he feels and he looks to me for support and of course I’m there to help him every step of the way. I’ve been down the job road before and I fear traveling down that road again. Once he is settled in a new position the only stresses I need to take on our my own. This is a struggle I face being highly sensitive. I’m battling headaches, tiredness and lots of emotions. But, I know things will get better.
I can’t wait for the day where I can feel alive again! I want to be able to eat out more, travel, and just go out and try new things. I realize more and more each year that I feel the most alive when I’m out in the world trying new things with my husband. I love spending time with friends, but what I love most is just me and my husband going and doing something completely brand new together. I have created a journal of dreams and goals (a bucket list). I’m anxious to start crossing some things off and start writing positive posts of my passion and excitement for life.