Hello World, Stay out of my space.

Everyone has a space bubble and everyone’s space bubble is a different size. Mine is quite large and I don’t take it well when people invade it. I hate it when people stand to close and I really hate when people get in my face.

I also tend to become easily overwhelmed in crowds of people. I can’t handle being surrounded by strangers, especially in tight close corners. I absolutely won’t go grocery shopping on a Saturday, because its way to crowded. I just feel drained of energy and can’t seem to shake it.

I don’t really need hugs from close or distant family and I’m very uncomfortable with receiving a kiss on the cheek. This doesn’t mean I don’t like to be touched. I just only embrace hugs from a select few people. There’s absolutely nothing better than a hug from my husband. He’s the only one I want any form of kisses from. I cuddle with my husband every night, and sometimes there’s nothing better than cuddling with him. I also love having pets to cuddle and hug.

When I was growing up the culture of my family and friends of family were to hug and kiss with every greeting. I really hated it, but people didn’t understand when I pulled away. Everyone loved to hug and kiss and be close. But, that was never a comfortable environment for me. The only thing I wanted to hug was a pet or the stuffed animal that I cuddled with every night. As I got older I realized I had to cave a little. I started to accept the hugs and just avoid the kisses. But, I’m still very stagnant in my ways. It doesn’t take a whole lot for me to feel uncomfortable. I then need distance from the source of my discomfort and space to be alone.

Recently, my space was invaded and I couldn’t escape the source of my discomfort. This guy thought it would be funny to wrap me up in tape, making it impossible for me to move. When I finally had the chance to get away, I just felt incredibly disoriented. I tried to process the situation in my mind and make sense of it, but I couldn’t. I was incredibly angry with this person and I knew they could see it all over my face as I walked out the door. This person is part of my extended family, so I’m left with the unfortunate discomfort of seeing them again. I have to forgive him, but I don’t know how to. Instead I choose to avoid him, because I can’t be around people who don’t respect my space and I’m not comfortable explaining to them the extent of my discomfort. I’ve read it’s best to cut people out of your life that bring negativity into your life. And being around this part of my family often has a negative influence on me. I try to give second chances, but at some point I just run out of second chances to give.

This is when I really realize how lucky I am to have a husband who never does anything to make me slightly uncomfortable. There’s no safer place for me then wrapped up in his embrace.

Why don’t people respect bubbles? Are people just so blinded by the fact that some people need more space? Or do they assume that is the only way to show friendship and affection? People need to open their eyes and study the world around them. If someone backs away, let them. Everyone’s bubble is different and some require a lot more space.

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3 thoughts on “Hello World, Stay out of my space.

  1. wow thank you for writing this. I feel exactly the same way, like hugs are great every once in a while, and being in any sort of crowded store makes me angry and upset. It’s actually almost impossible for me to fathom what it would be like to enjoy constant affection and close contact like lots of people seem to do. I wonder if there is a name for this need for space?!

    Like

    • I don’t know. Good to know I’m not the only one. I wish people understood that hugs are not always welcome especially for some people.

      Recently, I met this older gentlemen for coffee as a networking thing. It was the first time I met him and when he left he gave me a hug. I know he was just trying to be nice, but I did not appreciate it.

      Like

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